Will it ever re-lent.

So…

I’m really confused. There’s chocolate eggs everywhere, toy bunnies on sale and quite a few christians in the street, gathering in lovely bubbles of religiousness.

Yet, I forgot why…

…only joking…

…as if anyone could.

We’re pretty much slapped in the face by invisible people (as soon as we walk out our front doors) screaming: “It’s Easter, it’s Easter! Guess what? Bet you can’t guess! It’s Easter!”

And, I have to say that the Easter Bunny bit me hard. I’m looking forward to it this year and I’ve already bought the family their eggs (I hope they don’t read this. That would  be a surprise killer.)

But before any of that is Lent and I decided this time I would give something up and stick with it.

So…

I gave up all fizzy drinks and do you want to know something? Since doing so, I’ve actually put on weight.

So…

I’m going to over indulge on the fizzy stuff when Lent is over and stuff my face with as much chocolate (vegetarian/fair trade/animal-testing free) as my cheeks will allow.

I also bet that those scales will go the other way as well just to see me cry…

Chunky chocolate brownies (originally with 1/2 kilo of choc)

The recipe as promised:

In a bowl, melt 175g of butter with 175g of dark chocolate (or the original 225g of choc).

In a separate bowl whisk 2 eggs with 125g light muscovado sugar (can adjust either way to reflect sweetness preference, I prefer the brownies dark).

Pour the choc/butter mix into the egg/sugar mix. Whisk thoroughly.

Sieve 60g of self raising flour into the brownies, along with as much chopped milk chocolate or choc chips as you desire. You could add pretty much anything at this point. They’re going to make you fat anyway so adding more things just makes the process more enjoyable.

Mix thoroughly.

Whilst sneaking spoonfuls of the mix into your mouth, grease a baking tin with your other hand and pour the batter in.

Put into a pre-heated oven (gas mark 6), sneak one last spoonful and bake for 30 minutes or until cooked on the outside but still slightly gooey inside. Don’t open the oven door whilst cooking.

Leave to cool and then place in the fridge to properly set.

Serve however you wish, just make sure to apologise to whomever is eating them for the fingermarks/teethmarks in the brownies where you couldn’t resist nibbling at them.

Enjoy!

Brain like a seive full of flour

After pledging my commitment, I forgot all about it!

I said I would try to post some kind of cake recipe everyday but instead of creating a blog full of cake goodness, I’ve found myself eating them instead.

I do, however, have this really great brownie recipe that simply is delicious.

It was originally from a Cadbury recipe book but after Kraft took over (it’s questionable whether or not the ingredients are currently tested on animals- they never used to be but Kraft are publically notorious for it) and I realised that the recipe actually required just over HALF A KILO of chocolate, I did make a some slight adjustments.

Instead I use a considerably smaller amount of the gooey stuff and all chocolate I use is testing free; I also found that with the sweetness of the chocolate, you don’t even need the sugar really except for the rich depth of flavour.

So, I will post it tomorrow for all who worship the devilish stuff and in the meantime drool over the thought of one of those gooey, oozy, chocolaty, chunky brownies.

Hmm, I wonder if we have any eggs?

Chocolate/Syrup/Whatever flavour you want cake.

So, this is a microwaveable pudding because I’m lazy and when I get a craving, I want a cake that will rise to the size of a house but still make my thighs feel even heavier than before (if possible).

Oh and it’s vegan.

Method

4 Tbsp Self Raising Flour + 2 Tbsp Sugar (adjust to sweetness preference)

Mix together.

+ 4 Tbsp soy milk (or plain milk if immoral 😉

+ 4 Tbsp Vegetable oil (or knob of butter if…(see above)

Mix all this together to get your batter, if too thick then add more milk. If you are going for a syrup sponge then pop in the microwave until cooked through.

If you’re going for a chocolate sponge then add some good quality cocoa powder (the more the better) or add melted cooking chocolate and adjust the flour content slightly. Pour half of mix into microwaveable cup and in the middle pop some squares of cooking chocolate to make melt in the middle pudding. Pour over the rest of the mix and microwave.

Back to the plain sponge, take out and add syrup to your hearts delight.pudding_narrowweb__300x434,0

(Might not look exactly like above).

I really enjoyed this pudding. It might be, like, a zillion calories but it’s sweet and makes you feel guilty so stop complaining. Life couldn’t be better!

The Cake Pigeon

I love cake.

And I love Sarah Millican.

But I love cake more.

Live at the Apollo has housed some incredible comedic talent in its’ day and one who has performed there on numerous occasions is the one and only Sarah Millican; she’s just wonderful pet.

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Her hilarious tales on the everyday life of a 30 year old divorcee who’s slightly overweight exterior has got her into some hefty (but funny) situations has me in fits of raucous hysterics.

One joke that particularly tickled me was one she made about cake (something I am somewhat familiar with myself) so I just had to share it and spread the laughter (and the buttercream) around for everyone:

“So, er, I’ve got a new nickname. I haven’t had a nickname before- I’ve been called things but that’s different. No, my nickname’s the cake pigeon.

Because, whenever I walk past a cake shop…haha…walk past…

…Whenever I press myself up against a cake shop, I go: Oooooooooh.”

(No copyright intended.)

Ah Sarah, it’s as if we were separated at birth and I was frozen then woken up again fifteen years later; kind of like that Sarah Lee Gateau that’s defrosting on my kitchen counter.

I jumped around with delight when I found it at the bottom of the freezer. I mean, its years since they were discontinued and it’s slightly freezer burnt, but other than that it’s just champion, pet.